Yesterday my mom posted a picture on Facebook of my 5 year old brother Sam wearing a pair of shoes he picked out for his first day of preschool.
She explained to him in the store that they were really made for girls. Sam then told her that he didn’t care and that “ninjas can wear pink shoes too.”
Sam went to preschool and got several compliments on his new shoes. Not one kid said anything negative toward him about it.
However, my mom received about 20 comments on the photo from various family members saying how “wrong” it is and how “things like this will affect him socially” and, put most eloquently by my great aunt, “that shit will turn him gay.”
My mom then deleted the photo and told Sam that he can wear whatever he wants to preschool, that it’s his decision. If he wants to wear pink shoes, he can wear pink shoes.
Sam then explained to her that he didn’t like them because they were pink, he liked them because they were “made out of zebras” and zebras are his favorite animal :)
“In the last half century alone, more women and girls have died as a result of gender discrimination than all the men who died in all the battles of the 20th century, and more girls were killed in any one decade than all of those who died in the genocides of last century - girls are the most marginalised and discriminated group around the world.”—Deepali Sood (via msandrogynous)
“Fifteen to eighteen percent of girls under twelve now wear mascara, eyeliner and lipstick regularly; eating disorders are up and self-esteem is down; and twenty-five percent of young American women would rather win America’s Next Top Model than the Nobel Peace Prize. Even bright, successful college women say they’d rather be hot than smart. A Miami mom just died from cosmetic surgery, leaving behind two teenagers. This keeps happening, and it breaks my heart.
Teaching girls that their appearance is the first thing you notice tells them that looks are more important than anything. It sets them up for dieting at age 5 and foundation at age 11 and boob jobs at 17 and Botox at 23. As our cultural imperative for girls to be hot 24/7 has become the new normal, American women have become increasingly unhappy. What’s missing? A life of meaning, a life of ideas and reading books and being valued for our thoughts and accomplishments.”—“How To Talk To Little Girls” by Lisa Bloom (via crookedindifference)
This is a compilation of resources for female-assigned-at-birth (FAAB), non-male identified people who want top surgery. This document will include a list of surgeons who are willing to perform top surgery on genderqueer/non-male-identified…
“For women who want to communicate their need for sexual integrity to partners, and for men who want to transcend the pornographic imagination and empathize with their partners, the feminist critique offers a critique of male dominance and a vision of equality that can help. Instead of turning away from the unpleasant realities about how pornography is made, rather than ignoring the inhumanity of the images, rather than minimizing the effects of men’s use of pornography – we should face ourselves and face the culture we are creating.”—“Should I Do It?” To Women Who Struggle with Porn-Driven Sex. (via endporn)
“Am I arguing that girls and women shouldn’t be held responsible for their behaviour? Not at all. If a woman drinks to excess, then falls over in the street, loses her wallet and vomits all over her shirt, she has only herself to blame. But rape is not a consequence of getting drunk. It’s a consequence of a man deciding to rape someone.”—Emily Maguire, Princesses & Pornstars: Sex, Power, Identity. (via starsgowaltzing)
“A woman’s individual preoccupation with weight often serves as a mask for other, more intricate sources of discomfort, the state of one’s waistline being easier to contemplate than the state of one’s soul … how much self-acceptance she does or does not possess, how much pleasure she feels permitted to have, how much anxiety or guilt or shame her hungers arouse - these are the kinds of issues a woman may bring to the scale.”—Appetites by Caroline Knapp (via skirtingtheline)
Recently, my dad told me that I should start going to the gym more often, because I’ll look better, and when I look better, I won’t care so much about being objectified by men.
Even reading that your father said that to you pissed me off! That is insane. My dad is also really chauvinist and it’s hard really really to deal with. I find myself saying a lot of things, arguing, or just biting my tongue sometimes and giving up. Good luck though, and know you’re not alone!
Sometimes I wish I was a boy. It kind of feels like a betrayal to say that, but it’s true. Being a girl is fucking hard, even excluding all the cosmetic bullshit. It’s innate stuff. Little things. Nobody takes you quite as seriously, thinks you’re quite as smart or funny or hardworking or…